Did you know that teachers and schools are taking on more responsibilities in classrooms, largely due to circumstances at home and even as a result us all going through covid? This is just one area where adjustments are being made to provide support, often without parents even realizing it.
Why It Can Be So Hard:
We seldom discuss the burnout that comes from caring for someone who refuses to acknowledge their wounds or engage in the healing process.
When we attempt to fix, save, or rescue someone, we frequently lose sight of ourselves in the process. We become consumed by analyzing their behavior, and in our quest to understand them, we neglect our own needs. Consequently, our children bear burdens that do not belong to them and are left not necessarily knowing how to work through them.
Here's What You Should Know:
No level of love, effort, or explanation can foster growth in someone who is unwilling to change. A person lacking self-reflection may age, but they will not evolve.
A Reminder: A person doesn't have to drain you solely through arguments or conflicts; they can also drain you through a lack of communication, trust, empathy, apologies, acknowledgment, or neglecting your love language.
How It Affects Our Nervous System:
Our nervous systems reflect the energy of those around us. We can either co-regulate with someone or co-dysregulate.
What To Do About It:
Building a healthy relationship with someone disconnected from themselves is impossible. If you aim to help your children co-regulate, regardless of circumstances, it's essential to learn the fundamental tools that will support their growth. This is part of what our buddies do with the help of their how-to card.
As you heal, you come to understand that not everyone possesses the capacity or desire to grow and evolve. Some individuals serve as reminders of what happens when one does not. Ultimately, if schools are adapting to help children better understand emotions and self-regulation, parents can certainly learn a few new strategies as well.
If you’d like a starting point grab a buddy and their how-to card or go to our site and look up additional resources to view some of our favorite books read over the years that support our focus.
You Got This! We Got This!
~ The Lakunakai Team